Impossible Dreams

Everyone has them, or at least ought to have them: goals that they want to reach that are just on the other side of believability. Not the ones that involve conquering a country or elaborate revenge, though those are probably doable for some people. I mean the things that seem out of reach now, but might be possible if the dice fall the right way.

I used to think that living in England was one of those pipe dreams, along with royalties (of any amount) and getting into a Master's program. And now I'm here. Other pipe dreams have taken their place:

• Walking the coast of England for mental health research and awareness.
• Getting into and through a PhD program in one piece.
• Living in a country where the official language isn't English.
• Telling my dad to go buy a copy of the New Yorker so he can turn to a specific page and see my name.
• Selling a novel. Heck, selling three novels and being able to buy food from them. 
• Going back to the home I dream about. 
• Living without medication. Or mandatory doctor's appointments. 
• Not having to worry about visas and length of stay while I'm in the UK. 
• Fencing in the Olympics.

Ok, maybe the last one is a little far-fetched, but the rest could possibly happen, if I make them happen. Which makes me wonder, how many dreams have I let die because I couldn't see how to get there from where I was standing? And how many dreams have others let die for the same, or similar reasons? And the biggest question: Why?